Forecastle Band Lineup

It's summer again, time to spend hundreds of dollars to get sunburned among thousands of others trying to hear that new band from Brooklyn that you read about on a blog. That's right, it's festival season!

The Forecastle Festival, now in its eighth year, is the most jambitious festival in Kentucky. While it has not yet achieved the fame, respect or success of festivals such as Bonnaroo, Lollapalooza or Coachella, founder J.K. McKnight has single-mindedly attempted to make a great thing happen in Louisville.

While his intentions are to be praised, nothing in life is perfect, and we are happy to help those attending this year's festival by indicating how to best spend your time – what bands shouldn't be missed, what bands might make you happy while annoying your boyfriend, and what bands will send you running for the nearest beer stand.

Friday

WEST STAGE

Cage The Elephant – All the way from Bowling Green, these fellows have made waves at bigger festivals than this, probably because they sound like nice college boys having fun — imitating Weezer, The Strokes, The Pixies, etc. — and people are easily entertained.

The Whigs – From Athens, Ga., these earnest rockers are a tight, disciplined trio, unfurling new wave melodies with raw power. This is the band Kings of Leon think that they are.

Zappa Plays Zappa – A collection of Frank Zappa alums, this band is led by his famous-because-he-shares-the-same-last-name son, Dweezil, presumably because it's the easiest way they can all make money. It's the kind of jazz-rock fusion you'd hear on a cruise ship, lacking Frank's iconoclastic individuality and purpose.

Pretty Lights – “At a time when music lovers from almost all subcultures, and genres are finding common ground in the basic form of bangin' beats, Pretty Lights is giving the people what they want; electro organic cutting-edge party rocking beats that fill venues with energy and emotion, and send dance floors into frenzies.” From their own bio; I think they're being serious.

The Black Keys – A rock 'n' roll duo from Akron, Ohio, they are better than most at imitating the British Invasion bands who imitated old American bluesmen. Though often classified as “blues-punk,” they really have little to do with either genre, though they do utilize both's concepts of simplicity over flash.



EAST STAGE

Erin Hill and Her Psychedelic Harp with The Space Rats – Though this sounds like a trippy “Muppet Show” sketch, it's really just another kooky lady in the Tori Amos/Fiona Apple mold. This New Yorker plays a harp and might be diverting for a couple of songs.

The Young Republic – From Nashville, these youthful rockers have a lot of energy and a good string section, if not a lot of focus — they can't decide which '90s alt-rock band they want to be: Cake or Cracker or Matchbox 20?

The Lions Rampant – A Cincinnati trio that's at least honest about its influences — Blues Explosion, The Black Keys, etc. — with nary a mention of John Lee Hooker or Muddy Waters on its MySpace page. Fun if you like garage rock bands who sing lyrics like “Give it to me/Give it to me.”

Bad Veins – Another Strokes-ish new wave band, this one from Cincinnati. Decent but uninspired. Their first record's not even out yet, so check back in three years.

Hackensaw Boys – These Charlottesville bluegrass boys do a fine job of infusing their old-timey ideas with modern energy.

The Elmwood Band – Dave Matthews-esque jam rock from Nashville. So… yeah.

Jason Isbell & The 400 Unit – From Muscle Shoals, Ala., the ex-Drive By Trucker is working hard out there to be Wilco and not Son Volt. Credit is due to a man who tries to make music based not just in rock, but soul and country as well, aware of history but living in the present.

Saturday

WEST STAGE

The Detroit Cobras – John Waters' waking dream, this band of mostly women is a ferocious, fun group that tears up obscure soul songs with wit and skill. A highlight for music lovers of all ages.

The New Mastersounds - I don't get how none of the faux-freaks who love so-called jam bands listen to actual jazz, yet somehow can appreciate a well-done approximation of the real thing like this. These Brits have played with Lou Donaldson and Idris Muhammed, names which will mean nothing to fans of Umphrey's McGee.

Dead Confederate – From Athens, Ga., these intense, emotional guys make big, soaring anthems that are very serious. Fans of local favorites Elliott and Workers will enjoy them, though drunk people looking to party might want to check out the Southern Comfort tent instead.

The Black Crowes – They're no Rolling Stones — or Led Zeppelin, or Aerosmith, or ZZ Top, or AC/DC — but they sure do try. Honestly, though, it seems like we hear more these days about their love of weed than their records.

Widespread Panic – Fans are called “Spreadheads.” You might be surprised to know that they recorded a cover of “And It Stoned Me” for a compilation called “Hempilation.” They will play on two nights, though each performance will already feel like two.

EAST STAGE

Paper Airplane – Retro '70s pop meets modern indie rock from southern Ohio. Their melodies are cute and poppy and occasionally off-key, fit for a band who describe themselves as “a Wes Anderson movie come to life,” if that's still anyone's idea of Heaven.

Madi Diaz – Her bio declares that she has “a staggering voice and a gift for poignant melodies and innovative arrangements.” Yes, you'll love this ambitious Nashvillian, if you love childlike melodies and shouty vocals.

Arnett Hollow – Wow, an actual local band getting exposure? That's nice! These bluegrass revivalists, who include Bonnie Prince Billy collaborator Cheyenne Mize on fiddle, are promoting a new album and are always worth hearing.

The Broderick – Bloomington boys who play peppy modern rock a'la The Shins or Weezer. Popular sound these days, eh?

The Afromotive – The notion of middle-class Americans dancing to other middle-class Americans imitating the music of 1970s Nigeria is a bit much to take, but this 8-piece Afrobeat band from Asheville manages to do a decent job of imitating the music of Fela, or at least Antibalas.

The Deep Vibration – This Nashville group's Neil Young-in-Memphis rock 'n' soul is ragged but purposeful, and will surely keep their audience captivated. Don't get too high and miss this late afternoon highlight.

US Royalty – Remember that dance-punk thing that was all the rage, like, seven years ago? These D.C. guys sound like they're trying to get all the girls to dance, and then to hook up with them in the bathroom.

AutoVaughn – Yet another non-country act from Nashville, their energetic '80s rock will certainly delight fans of Duran Duran.

Trevor Hall – This young fellow has flowers tattooed on his chest and sings in what I can only assume is supposed to be a reggae patois. Peter Tosh's nightmare fuses his unique attack on reggae with a very shiny corporate rock sound that will delight anyone who thinks that John Mayer is a great poet.

The Royal Bangs – An energetic, driving pop-rock band from Knoxville that has made a name for itself on the festival circuit.

Annuals - A much-blogged about group of youngsters from Raleigh whose melodic, intricate pop-rock has earned them tour spots with the Flaming Lips and Bloc Party. (Hey, wouldn't those be great bands to see at a local festival?)

Man Man – A definite highlight of the weekend is this inventive, wild group from Philadelphia who can't help but be compared to Tom Waits, Mr. Bungle and carnies at a strip club. Or, instead, you could see Widespread Panic play 20-minute keyboard solos.

Sunday

WEST STAGE

Outformation – Jazz-Southern rock fusion from Atlanta. Though they are a skilled group of musicians, the vocals are so tuneless that it's hard to enjoy them. This Marshall Tucker Band/Outlaws style was briefly popular during the “WKRP in Cincinnati” '70s, but might not appeal to listeners today under 50.

Umphrey's McGee – Their bio says that they are “Midwestern monsters of improvised rock.” But wait — isn't Umphrey's a jam band? Not these days. “We trimmed a lot of the fat,” guitarist Jake Cinninger says on the band website. Sounds like they feel guilty that this stuff goes on for way too long and melodies remain undeveloped.

Yonder Mountain String Band – From that hippie haven Colorado comes a bluegrass/folk group that takes the time to write lovely songs then play them with style. A talented, surprising group well worth your time.

The Avett Brothers –Another fine bluegrass-ish band that doesn't pretend to have arrived from 1948, they spent years playing, improving and winning fans all over. Their upcoming Sony record should make them this fall's kings of NPR.

Widespread Panic – Is this a new set, or is the one from Saturday still going on?

EAST STAGE

Chemic – Wow, a second local band? Crazy! Their Death Cab-style indie/folk rock is charming and thoughtful, and loaded with potential.

Almira Fawn – Okay, so she's from Lexington. Anything else interesting about her? Oh, right — she's 11-years old. And has a song called “Chillax.” Yet, somehow, she's a lot more soulful than Taylor Swift or Sheryl Crow. Give her a chance!

Rosi Golan – This Israeli pianist's sensitive songs have been used on TV's “One Tree Hill” and “Private Practice.”

Pokey LaFarge & S. City Three – LaFarge, an occasional Louisvillian, is a modern Leon Redbone, enjoyably reviving the jazzy blues of the 1920s (he calls it “riverboat soul”) in a manner that will also attract fans of Devendra Banhart.

Jonathan Tyler & Northern Lights – These leather pants rockers from Dallas, now on tour with Lynyrd Skynyrd, sound like a cross between Kings of Leon, The Black Crowes and the Doobie Brothers.

Gringo Star – This Atlanta band is much better than their “hilarious” name indicates. Their version of BritPop stretches all the way from the mod Kinks to the stadium riffs of Oasis, and is a pleasant throwback.

Adam Franklin – A solo set from the guy from Swervedriver, a band that was the British version of Smashing Pumpkins back when MTV showed videos. Shoegazing optional.

The Instruction –The third of three Louisville bands, these heavy rockers have a Glenn Danzig-meets-Jim Morrison vibe goin' on that makes them an atypical favorite of 91.9 FM.

Seabird – Modern rock from Cincinnati youth, the type oft-used on “One Tree Hill” or “Private Practice” to drive home the melodrama.

These United States –A little bit country, a little bit rock 'n' roll and a little bit indie, these D.C-via-Lexington guys have a literate, rollicking sound that suggests a Southern Bright Eyes, or any other decent Bob Dylan disciple.

Maps and Atlases – Seasick art rock a'la Vampire Weekend, TV On The Radio and The Sea and Cake. To be fair, they're much better at it than Vampire Weekend, who are probably too expensive to bring to a local festival, anyway.

Backyard Tire Fire – Amiable, solidly Midwestern schizophrenics who can't decide if they prefer '70s classic rock, '80s hair metal or today's quirky indie. The bio includes blurbs from members of Cracker and Los Lobos, so those under 40 may as well head out to the inevitable trichomoniasis-infested after-party with DJ WhoCares.

c. 2009 Velocity Weekly

Some of the best local discs, 2009, so far

Arnett Hollow
Night After Night

After a bluegrass-infused debut, AH has returned with a second disc that is more slick, more NPR-friendly, but also more distinct and original. Now known to inquiring out-of-towners as the home band of Bonnie Prince Billy fiddler/vocalist Cheyenne Mize, AH has become more like Nickel Creek and less like Del McCoury. Though their new style has its downsides (such as a less tight, more jammy rhythm section) the vocal interplay between Mize and songwriter/guitarist Chris Rodahaffer is lovely, and might sweep you away.

Bad Blood
EP
This brief follow-up to their self-titled first record doesn't improve on the album titles, but is another raw, amped-up collection of garage rock thrillers. Fans of the MC5 and the Bell Rays should already know about them, one of the absolute best live bands in town.

Invaders
Floating

The new band led by Joe Meredith, formerly of the Beatles-esque Merediths, is surprising not just because of Meredith's more poppy pedigree, but also because there are few bands left making sounds like this. The Invaders live near rock music but probably won't be understood by the AC/DC fan next door. Fans of the Sun City Girls and early Butthole Surfers will be pleased, however, to find a new psychedelic, grainy mindblast of a band. Meredith's vocals are mixed lower than most singers, taking his vocals away from the spotlight and melding them into the rest of the instruments. A band like this can't be found at just any club, so listen to Second Story Man's Carrie Neumayer, who "thinks the Invaders CD is the best local album I've heard in a long time."

The Mack
Lazy Bones

One of the weirdest - and I mean that as high praise - singer/songwriters you'll get to hear, this fellow comes up with names, ideas and melodies that you'd never expect (he formerly led a band called The I'll Beat Your Back Out Band). Once you enter his world - a little David Lynch, a little Will Oldham, a little Flannery O'Connor - you'll want a front row seat. If you can't hum gems like "Prisoner's Lake" or "Monongahela" to your puppy at night, you probably have a cold heart.

Sandpaper Dolls
Live at 21C

These 3 women sing from a place so deep down that you can practically see their intestines. An a capella Nina Simone would be the closest legit comparison, though "The Andrews Sisters on angel dust" has probably been tossed around. This live recording documents just how surely they can quiet down a room of otherwise excited devotees.

Heartless Bastards interview

I recently had a chance to ask Heartless Bastards leader Erika Wennerstrom a few important questions. Her band plays tonight at 8 p.m., before Jenny Lewis, at Headliners.

You're from Cincinnati, originally, but recently moved to Austin. You know that Louisville's an even better city, right? Why Austin and not Louisville? And please praise Louisville and/or insult Cincinnati in your response!

Ha!

Your band has gone through a complete overhaul, and you are the last original member left. Did you consider going out under your own name, or did you think that Wennerstrom sounded too much like a totally awesome metal band?

Ha! again. I don't think Wennerstrom works well as a name. I like having a band name. Even though members have changed, I've always written the songs. This has always been my project, so there's no need to change the name if a member has left.

Can you settle this downloading business once and for all? Is it stealing, or does it help you?

I guess it's a little of both. People always say record companies are evil, which I guess they can be in some ways, but a lot of the bands you hear of are because the record company paid a publicist to get bands in magazines and papers, and they paid a radio person to get you heard on the radio. They also probably paid for the recording of the artist you've been listening to, also. If record companies fall, then it's going to be so much harder for the artist to get their music out to people. The average artist can't pay for things like publicists themselves. The internet helps, but everything is so saturated that there can be too much bad music to sift through to find good stuff.

Your band exists in what some call the "indie" world, because your records aren't distributed by one of the 4 major labels left. Do you find this limiting or misleading?

Right now I think bands are better off on an indie label, personally.

Jenny Lewis is a li'l bit country and a li'l bit indie rock. Are you worried that your raw power might blow her away every night?

Jenny Lewis is a great songwriter and performer. She's a powerhouse in her own right. We are different, but have a lot of similarities, too. I think both her fans and our fans are perfectly capable of liking more than one kind of sound.

NPR said that your "sprawling voice... echoes the influence of Neil Young, Otis Redding and MC5." How is it possible to sound like all of those at once?

Well, I try to sound like those 3, and about 100 other artists as well, so I think I end up finding my own voice in the process of mimicking them all.

Are you looking forward to the upcoming movie about the Runaways, in which the girl from Twilight plays Joan Jett?

Well, this question is the first time I've even heard there was a movie about that. I'm not sure if I'm looking forward to it or not. It depends on how well it's done. There are so many good ideas executed in horrible ways.

You're playing here on a Monday night. That sounds like it's probably not as fun for you as a Friday or Saturday. Am I wrong?

Well, I'm in a venue every night. It's all the same day to me. I don't think there is a no fun Monday rule or anything.





c. 2009 Velocity Weekly

Ask a bartender

I've learned a couple of things about bartenders lately. After showing up at a handful of popular bars from West Downtown to St. Matthews and asking bartenders (8 women and 2 men) the same questions, I've found that I no longer need to be afraid of them. Everyone that I bothered was exceedingly friendly and helpful. When you've had 4 drinks and it's not even midnight, it can be easy to forgot one's manners. But as they all agree, "Just be nice."
Oh, and don't forget to tip them.
I also had a couple of musical suspicions confirmed - that people in this town cannot get enough of the same classic rock hits, karaoke or not; and, if you are likely to get tired of Irish music, you probably shouldn't take a job in an Irish pub.
That's great, you say - but do I have a chance of taking that hot bartender home tonight? Read on...

What's your favorite drink to pour?
PC: I really, really love making car bombs. Those are my favorite! And we make a lot of those. I just think they're so much fun, especially if people have never had them before, I like to see their reaction.
JH: Oh, I'd have to say bourbon and Coke. It's easy, and Kentucky, so that's a good one.
LA2: Oh! That's a tough one. Probably a martini we have -- La Peche martini. It's peach and orange juice, pureed and pomegranate syrup.
BG: Umm, I would probably say...oh gosh, hold on ... um ... um ...
RC: That's a tough one... A beer, because it's quick and easy.
AC: Guinness, I love pouring Guinness, it's my favorite.
MZ: Bloody Mary. It's just simple. You ask people what they want in it, how they want it.
AL: I really enjoy making dirty martinis. I enjoy drinking them, as well.
JMa: Ahh, that's a good question. Whiskey on the rocks. It's what I like to drink.
JMi: Well, seeing as we only serve beer and wine, I would have to say beer!
SU - LITs. Long Island Iced Teas. Because there's a lot of liquor in there. They're fun to pour. If you make a good LIT, that's how I know you're a good bartender.
JMc - I like making martinis. They're fun, 'cause you get to shake 'em up - it's a lot less boring than just pouring liquor.
LH - A Bud Lite, 'cause it's easy.
TB - Bourbon.

What's your least favorite drink to pour?
PC: Anything that I've never heard of that's just ridiculous. "Alien Secretion", who even knows what that is? If I have to ask them what's in it, I don't care. It makes me feel like not a very good bartender (laughs).
JH: Anything that requires more than three ingredients. Anything I don't know how to make. Anything that doesn't seem like it goes with this kind of place.
LA2: Maybe Mojitos. Just 'cause it's all of the work involved.
BG: Definitely Margarita. Just because it takes so long. Typically, they want to get s--tfaced.
RC: A Vodka Red Bull. I don't know why I don't like it. You have to pour Vodka, then you have to get out the can of Red Bull, open it up and it takes really a long time to pour the Red Bull.
AC: Blue Moon, I guess. It never pours right.
MZ: Any kind of really complicated drink. Somebody asks for a Mojito, then I've got to make 12 Mojitos in a night. Kinda makes me want to tear out my hair a little.
AL: Probably anything frozen, but we don't have blenders here, so I don't have to worry about that too much. Here, probably Margaritas. It's just time-consuming.
JMa: I hate making Margaritas. It's a pain in the ass. The whole setup. That or a Long Island Iced Tea. We have a couple foo-foo Martinis that can be a pain in the ass. So many ingredients as well as garnishes. Pineapple, or whatever it might be.
SU - I hate making martinis. I hate it. Any kind of martini. If people order martinis, that usually means they're particular about what they want to drink and how it tastes, and if you make it just a little off to where their standards are, you're a bad bartender to them.
JMc - I'd have to say making draft samplers (NOTE: the interviewer had requested a draft sampler). Yeah. It's a little time-consuming. Yeah (laughs), it's horrible, isn't it?
LH - Car Bombs. They're very dirty. When you drop the Baileys in the Guinness, it curdles. People don't know that... we have to soak the glasses for a while.
TB - Mojito, which we don't make.

What's the worst thing you've seen or overheard at the bar?
PC: Well, the most disgusting thing that's ever happened is, a girl that I used to bartend with was trying to get a bottle off the top shelf fell off. She actually broke her ankle, and when I was walking through, her ankle was like, (indicates messed up ankle). It was like sticking up. That was kinda hard to ... yeah. And girls fall off the bar all the time. Which is funny, but kinda scary at the same time. The crowd usually catches them.
JH: Oh, wow. The biggest compliment you can ever pay someone in a bar is buy them a drink. Best thing you can do that's the opposite of that is to refuse a drink from someone. Don't accept the drink they buy you. Or, "If you bought me a drink, I would pour it out." That's a pretty good line.
LA2: We've had lots of people fall down. Had a few fights. Interesting conversations... Random conversations.
BG: Seen a guy making out with two drunks. He had a wedding ring on and neither of them did.
RC: I don't know, it's not really that kind of bar. Probably the guy who looked like a zombie.
AC: I don't know, you hear weird s--t all the time, they all blend together anymore.
MZ: I heard a guy babbling about giving birth to a baby cow the other day. I'm making Bloody Marys, no less, and he's talking about being a midwife, and sheep and then cows - just kinda gross.
AL: I used to work at a hotel downtown, when we had Breeder's Cup. There was a couple of celebrities floating around; they were talking about going upstairs and doing a certain kind of drug.
JMa: Cheating - a lot of times you 'll see people meeting discreetly, that's about the worst thing I've really seen.
JMi: Wow... probably intimate details of people's sex lives. People fighting - (a colleague interjects: "A girl on a date with a girl, talking about a date she went on with another girl. Remember that?") Yeah! ("She was telling all these graphic details about the other girl - while she was on a date.") Yeah, sometimes you hear people talk about their sex life, or how they were last night... It's not something you try to remember, y'know?
SU - Usually, it's always something to with guys and things they've done to girls. From my perspective, I have to listen to them ... it's always the worst thing I've ever heard. You always hear about some guy leaving some girl behind because she wouldn't give out or something like that. 99 percent of the time, I hear some f***ed-up guy stories. It's always a bad thing to hear.
JMc - That's a really hard question. I don't know.
LH - Oh, I've got to be really careful with that. I don't know.
TB - Probably, like, 'There's a turd on the toilet in the men's room.' That was the most recent.

Is there a song you hate on the jukebox, or radio?
PC: Yes! That "I would walk 500 miles." You know what that is? Worst song ever played, ever written -- it comes on occasionally here.
JH: No. We pick all our own stuff, so if we don't like it, it's our own fault. The "Free Credit Report.com" commercial (from the TV).
LA2: Probably that "Had a Bad Day" song. Or any Nickelback song. (laughs) It gets played a lot.
BG: Let me see, there are so many of them. I would probably have to say... we have the farm machinery show, so they sing it 35 times.
RC: I would say the one I just changed - "Zombie", by the Cranberries. I don't like 'most favorite' or 'least favorite' questions - you can say it's one of (my least favorite).
AC: I'm getting a little tired of Led Zeppelin. A little bit. Just slightly. They play a lot of Beatles and a lot of Led Zeppelin, it gets old.
MZ: We have playlists. The problem is they play, like, every three hours. There are songs that I used to love... honestly, a lot of My Morning Jacket songs I can't stand - they play every five minutes. It's funny, they're songs that I used to love.
AL: Yeah! I hate hearing any Journey songs. I like Journey, but I hear them all the time. That, and "The Devil Went Down to Georgia," 'cause I hear it 5,000 times in a row, and everyone likes to scream at the top of their lungs.
JMa: There's a handful! There's one that plays on the iPod they have here, and it's called "That's My Daughter in the Water" (by Loudon Wainwright III) and it's so annoying, I hear it so many times. It plays mostly during the day time, they have different ones for different times of day - y'know, after 9, the music gets a little bit more upbeat. But yeah, I hear it three or four times during the day.
JMi: We listen to WFPK here, so they play a lot of Sheryl Crow. I wish we had a jukebox, so it could be a little bit different, 'cause what they play's kinda the same, kind of montone, y'know?
SU - Any Skynyrd. I love Skynyrd, I do with all my heart, but you hear that all the time here. Like clockwork, every couple hours. That, and really bad '90's hip-hop. Stuff that shouldn't have ever come out.
JMc - I get tired of hearing our Irish songs on the iPod over and over again.
LH - We listen to Irish music all day, so pretty much most of the basic Irish tunes, but right now least favorite - which is everyone's most favorite -- what's the song that's at the end of The Sopranos? The Journey song, 'Don't Stop Believin'' That makes me absolutely crazy right now. And 'Sweet Caroline.' They play that a lot.
TB - For a while, we had Michael Jackson on there. It's not that awful - it was 'Thriller' - but I grew up with it in the '80s, so it had no kitsch value to me.

What's the quickest way to get a bartender to like me?
PC: I will always take care of the people that are patient, and stand there quietly and are not rude first. That's the best way to get served anywhere.
JH: Just be cool. If the bartender's busy, don't keep trying to talk to us or tell him some story that he doesn't care about. Just make friends with the bartender on the bartender's own time. Tipping helps, too.
LA2: Probably just being polite. I have people stake out the bar - that's a big no-no. Or snap their fingers or wave or anything. If I'm busy, "I see you, I'll get to you as soon as I can."
BG: Tip well, every day.
RC: Just to get them talking, and smile.
AC: Don't be difficult. Be easy. Hang out.
MZ: Talk about them, ask them questions. Everyone likes to talk about themselves.
AL: Probably not overdoing the manners, but also having manners. Don't wave things in our face like your money or your hands. We understand that there's a lot of people on the other side of the bar, wanting drinks - and there's only two of us. We'll eventually get there to you.
JMa: Tipping of course, but also just being friendly, talking, making chit-chat. A lot of times, we'll say, "Hey, how you doing?" - "Bud Light." Just a friendly attitude like I would try to give off to them.
JMi: I think you have to be open-minded and be able to be tolerant. If you don't have any patience whatsoever, then you shouldn't be a bartender. People are going to annoy you anyway, regardless, but you have to have patience with people. Just be tolerant of drunken behavior (laughs), so you don't make yourself crazy.
SU - First of all, tipping. Everybody needs to tip well. The main thing is, be patient. A lot of people walk up to the bar and they immediately want service. Like I'm not serving 100 other people. It's usually people who work in hospitality -- they're totally understanding of the situation.
JMc - No yelling, and I hate it when people wave money - like if you wave a dollar bill over the counter late night to get your attention. Be nice, polite, say, 'Hey, what's going on?' and I'll like you. We're all laid back, I think.
LH - Common courtesy. It's just basic things that you should extend to everyone all the time the later in the night.
TB - Just be nice. Just be nice.

What's the quickest way to get a bartender to hate me?
PC: Do this (snaps fingers) or, "Excuse me!" (clapping hands) "I've been here for a while!" or, if they think they know you, so they say your name out loud. That's annoying.
JH: One thing that drives me crazy is someone will walk in with a CD and say, "Can you play this?" That drives me absolutely crazy. People who walk in and feel like they have a sense of entitlement to do whatever they want just 'cause they're spending money here. That's not the way it goes. Anybody that has an attitude like they want to fight, anybody that has any kind of macho attitude. Guys that slobber all over women they don't know, that's really annoying. That's the big ones there.
BG: Yell or raise your hands.
RC: Be rude and not tip.
AC: Be an a**hole - or a poor tipper. One of the two. Or both, which is just awful.
MZ: When someone tries to correct me on something that's obvious - don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly happy to be corrected if they know what they're talking about. It's hard to bite your tongue after a while. Someone condescends to you, makes you feel stupid sometimes.
AL: Probably asking me for free drinks. Or free shots... all the time.
JMa: Scream, hand jestures - some people try to talk to us like we're dogs, just talking down to us.
JMi: I don't like it when people put their glass on their head when they want another beer. Or snap their fingers. Just, when they don't show you the respect that you're a person of worth because you're serving them - like, you're their servant or something. That's the biggest thing. It's surprising how much people don't respect their bartender or their server, y'know? It continues to shock me. But at Cumberland, we have a lot of really awesome regulars, people who treat us well. I'm pretty lucky.
SU - Don't tip well. Or complain about every nitpicking thing - "I need a little more ice," "I don't like the straw, give me a bigger straw." Or be impatient, or want people to put all the attention on you. That's not how a bar works.
JMc - Throwing stuff, yelling at you. I get a lot of late night people yelling, 'HEY! YOU!' I hate that. It's horrible. I pretend like they're not there for a few minutes until they're polite (laughs).
LH - Snapping is really bad. "HEY! HEY!" Waving their hands in your face - and then when they get your undivided attention, they have no idea what they want to drink.
TB - Calling me 'chief', 'big guy', any of that stuff.

Ever gone home with a customer?
PC: Not me. But I know a lot of people that have! (laughs) I'm definitely in a committed relationship, so -- I mean, part of our job is to flirt, but, no.
JH: I'm gonna have to go "no comment" on that one. My mother reads this. (laughs).
LA2: No, never have gone home with a customer. I've had offers, but ... People will give out room numbers, or people who want to go out later. I've had people ask to pay $100 to see my boobs. So, I mean, pretty ballsy people, definitely, but no, never.
BG: Yes, my boyfriend.
RC: I met my boyfriend here. (laughs) So, yes! We've been together two years. He was a regular. He doesn't come in anymore. He said he got what he wanted, now he doesn't have to come in anymore. (Wow!) Yeah. (smiling) (That's what he said, really?) Yes, but he was being sarcastic.
AC: (laughs) Never! I would never do that!
MZ: I've gone out with customers, but never gone home with one. I'll take 'em to Freddie's after work.
AL: I have not, actually. I have a strict rule for myself. Plus, I'm sure it would get around town and that's not good for me. No. I've made a lot of friends through this, but (laughs) I'm not going home with people.
JMa: Yeah, my fiancee.
JMi: Yeah. Sure! I mean, my boyfriend's a customer. (Did you meet him here?) I did, yeah!
SU - I've never been like, "Hey, come back to my house," after first meeting them. There have been nights when I've given people my number. Hang out here, then we can go to a 24-hour place and hang out, then slowly and surely, the next week -- I'm a big fan of not bringing them over the first night, 'cause then they think -- they get really cocky and think they get any bartender, and I don't want anybody to think that about bartenders. I'm a good person, I think.
JMc - No (laughs). No. Absolutely not! And that'll never happen!
LH - No. Well, no. I've eventually started dating customers. I've never just... the majority of the guys I've dated I've met here. But it's not been a, 'Hello. What can I get you to drink? What are you doing later?' Not like that. But yeah, I have dated customers. We'll meet and then go out - we'll go out for drinks somewhere else.
TB - No. Well... not in any fun, hooking-up way. More of a chaperone-istic role, I guess.

PC - Sully's
JH - Seidenfaden's
LA2 - Red Star Tavern
BG - Saddle Ridge
RH - BBC Main St.
LB - Granville Inn
EH - Cahoots
LA1 - Outlook Inn
TE - Dublin's Cellar
MC - Monkey Wrench
AG - BBC St. Matthews
RC - Flanagan's
AC - Zeppelin Cafe
MZ - Proof at 21C
AL - Saints
JMa - Brendan's
JMi - Cumberland Brews
SU - Highlands Tap Room
JMc - O'Shea's
LH - Molly Malone's
TB - Nachbar

c. 2008-09 Velocity Weekly

The concept album

Music fans of a certain age might remember the concept album. The idea — telling one oft-incoherent story over 12 overblown rock songs — gave us such beloved characters as Tommy and Mr. Roboto. An idea best remembered on some VH1 show, you say?

Apparently, no one told The Decemberists. The literary-minded band's latest, The Hazards of Love, out this week, is a concept album that one critic described as "about a girl named Margaret, shapeshifters, forest queens and fairytale treachery."

But the concept album doesn't have to be ridiculous. These five set the standard.

Husker Du, Zen Arcade
(1984): The story of a runaway who learns just how hard life is found this intense trio taking punk rock far beyond its previous boundaries. A generation of fans, musicians and critics was changed, though you'd never know it by album sales alone

Marvin Gaye, Here, My Dear
(1978) After a messy divorce, Gaye agreed to record an album to pay off his debts. Gaye couldn't help but use the album as therapy, bringing seductive soul to lyrics like, "When did you stop loving me, when did I stop loving you?"

David Bowie, The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars
(1972): The story of the rock star as alien, here to help us humans before we destroy our civilization, is better known and enjoyed for its cutting-edge glitter rock sound and transgendered live show.

The Kinks, The Kinks Are the Village Green Preservation Society
(1968): Young Decemberists fans would be wise to check out this actually-British group. This tale of enjoying rural life as an escape from the big, bad modern city has melodies for miles.

Frank Sinatra, In the Wee Small Hours
(1954): Considered the first long-player grouped around a theme, Sinatra hit his stride with this collection of tearjerkers about staying up late, lamenting lost love.



c. 2009 The Courier-Journal

Unsung Songwriters

Flying under the radar, 'outsider' musicians play to the beat of a different drummer.

“Have you ever been to a place / where there exists no human race? / doobie doobie doo / doobie doo,” begins “Questionnairre,” the most famous song by Victoria Galinsky. Pianos tinkle percussively, suggesting a lost sister of Tori Amos or Fiona Apple.

It’s Galinsky’s most famous song because she made a video for it, which has been viewed on YouTube 755 times, a surprisingly low number considering that the video is unforgettable. In it, Galinsky floats in front of a computer-generated suburban house, plastic green leaves flowing from her head to her shoulders, like a mom who drank too much wine at a toga party. Then, a bench filled with teens appears. They laugh as if embarrassed to be participating. Not much else happens.

Galinsky, 40, has released four full-length albums since 1997, with titles like Space Ovary and One Bean Taco, to Go. On her MySpace profile, she writes, "I'm an ancient healer from Atlantis. I have a broken crystal from the land of the young. It is thousands of years old. Possibly 50,000 years. Spaceships are following me."



Outsider musicians like Galinsky channel the sounds heard in their heads and transfer them onto compact discs, so that others may share in their journey.

"They're definitely some of the most ambitious and eclectic people housed in our local music section, in terms of personality," said Sean Bailey, whose job at the record store Ear X-tacy is to figure out which local bands and artists are worthy of inclusion in the store's inventory.

And they are persistent. Corporate radio stations treat them like red-headed stepchildren, while non-profit WFPK-FM, the city's only meaningful outlet for local musicians, treats them as curiosities at best. But they soldier on.

Markus is the nom de rock of Mark Spence, who’s "42 going on 21". He plays stadium-ready, synthesizer-driven rock that otherwise died in the 1980s after being perfected by the likes of Journey and Whitesnake. Fans (many of them employed at Ear X-tacy, Music-Go-Round and Wild & Woolly Video) tout his pure, Springsteen-esque approach to rock and romance, with songs like “Play It Loud”, “Winner in You”, “This Must Be Love”, “A Better Man”, “Champion” and “Stand Up (Shout Out Loud)” testifying to his single-minded approach.



A grocery store employee, Spence performs all of his songs using computer software programs, lately working with co-writers via phone or online. Spence, like Galinsky, offers his discs for sale through CD Baby, a website popular with independent musicians. "I wouldn't mind having a lot of people listen to me without having to jump through hoops," he said, "and I'm thankful for the internet."

In Jeffersonville, the girls of The Hi-Tops range between 10 and 14 years old and have been playing for four years now. They started after a viewing of Freaky Friday (the remake, not the original) inspired them to rock out like a young Lindsay Lohan.

This past January, they played a showcase at the National Association of Music Merchants trade show, where they performed for a talent scout from Nickelodeon. Locally, they've played at Waterfront Park, the Phoenix Hill Tavern, and at a fundraiser for then-Senator Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign, where they met original riot grrl Chelsea Clinton. When they need to get around, they hop into their brightly colored bus or their limo, a customized 1976 Cadillac.



However, the girls - Ally Whitlow, Bayley Whitlow, Remi Maxwell, Jessie Madill and Madi Cunningham - profess to be more ordinary. "Don’t need to be 'American Idol' / Don’t need to be a movie star / Don’t need to have a fancy title / Just be who you truly are," they preach in the inspirational tune "You". Another song, "Welcome to My World," describes in detail an average day in the teen life. "Can you dig it? I live it!"

Okolona resident Ronald Jenkees hasn't traveled far from his roots ("I grew up in good ol' PRP"), but his videos on YouTube – he calls it, charmingly, "YouTubes" – have made fans out of Katy Perry, Linkin Park and ESPN's Bill Simmons. With an exaggerated country boy persona fused with a passion for videogame-style electronic keyboards, Jenkees has earned 90,000 subscribers on YouTube, people who have signed up to be alerted whenever he posts a new video. Simmons commissioned him to compose a theme for his podcast, and Jenkees is meeting with members of Papa Roach next month to discuss doing a remix of one of the band's songs.

The 28-year-old is able to call music his job, fueled by sales of his album through iTunes and his website. Though he's interested in working as a producer, in the style of trendsetters like Timbaland and Dr. Dre, Jenkees is close with his family, loves his hometown and has no desire to live the life of a touring musician.



For now, he says he’s happy because he gets to combine "two of my favorite things in the world - music and goofiness." His second album - "(It) was supposed to come out last summer, then Christmas, now I've stopped naming dates" - is sure to get more acclaim for the guy who just can't crank out YouTubes fast enough to satisfy his fans.

"People can see when you're really having fun. It's contagious."

c. 2009 Velocity Weekly

Read the graphic novels

By now you're probably sick of hearing all the hype about Watchmen. Heath Ledger isn't in it, and you don't even wear a watch. Plus, you're a literary purist and you heard that they changed the book's ending to make it more Hollywood.

Here are five graphic novels that you can read while everyone else goes to the movies:

"Maus," by Art Spiegelman
The two-part epic, a true story about a Holocaust survivor, his son and the effects of World War II on their people, earned a Pulitzer Prize and forever redefined the possibilities of what comics could do.

"Our Cancer Year," by Harvey Pekar and Joyce Brabner
Fans of the Pekar comic "American Splendor" — and its movie adaptation — might have missed this 1994 title about Harvey's fight against cancer. I know, but it's funnier than it sounds.

"Blankets," by Craig Thompson
This story, also true, beautifully depicts a boy coming of age, discovering love and dealing with religion. It has prettier pictures and is a faster read than any other 600-page work.

"Palestine," by Joe Sacco
Journalist and world-traveler Sacco first got attention with this eye-opening account of his journey to Israel in the 1990s. He shows how everyday people — on both sides — are affected there by the fighting that is consistently going on around them.

"Fun Home," by Alison Bechdel
In flashbacks, the author relates how she realized that she is a lesbian. Soon, she discovers that, in her family, she's not the only one hiding her truth. The title refers to the family funeral home that Bechdel's father ran. Ouch.

c. 2009 Louisville Courier-Journal